Demanding the best

Despair

A truly terrifying emotion
Conceivably a consequence
Of complete and utter dedication
To a goal with no recompense.

ARC

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Demanding the best

For me this has seemingly always been part of my mentality. From the first time I picked up a basketball in 1st grade, I have always held myself to the highest standards I could. I've always known that I'm not good enough to achieve what I want. Don't get me wrong, there have been moments when I've fallen off that wagon, as there are with every human being, but I always had someone to kick me in the ass and rattle my head around a bit to get me back to the place I need to be. For most of my life, it was my step-dad, who was a great athlete in his day. In college, it was Bruns telling me I was fat and bad at frisbee. It occurs to me that this isn't true for everyone. Complacency is the norm and my mentality is the exception and people don't always have those people to nudge them back in the right direction.

So how, as a coach or leader, get your players to demand the best of themselves?
Most of the time, you can't just yell at them to do better. See Jevons. I've yelled at him a hundred times for jogging on the field, but it still happens all the time. I think the demand for one's best has to come from someone within their circle of trust, someone they believe is in the arena with them, taking hits and protecting their back - see Daring Greatly for an in depth explanation of what I mean here. I want to get to a point where I am that person for my players like Bruns was for me. It doesn't seem like I'm there yet with most of the players on NUT.
The answer for me then is simply to become Bruns - everyone loves him. No, but seriously the answer is to have your players believe you are in this with them so they trust the things you ask of them are important I guess. More work to do here.

Why is demanding the best something to strive for?
Year after year, NUT leadership has said they want NUT to reach the next level of competition. To do this, we have to get better at playing frisbee. If you don't demand the best from yourself and those that follow you, you fall into a place of complacency. From 2012 to 2014, our regionals finishes went from 10th to 5th to 3rd (after losing in the 1st and 2nd place games). From 2015 to 2017, our regionals finishes have all been 5th (aka losing in quarterfinals).
Perhaps there is more than just correlation here. 2012-2014 correspond to Ben's leadership years on NUT. Ben didn't accept losing as a legitimate option. And though he may not have held himself to the same standard, he held NUT to this standard of not losing. There hasn't been the same demand for the best from each and every player since he left. There has been more of an acceptance of failure and losing. Some times this acceptance is by choice - leadership choosing to prioritize development in the fall and winter over winning games has created an environment in which NUT players are used to losing games. Other times this acceptance is by ignorance or apathy - no one holding players accountable for jogging in drills, perhaps not even noticing.

ARC