Recovery

For what feels like the too many-ith time in my life, I am recovering from a rather severe injury. This one more than any other has challenged my mental strength and fortitude. Hard to say if its simply because I've lost count of my injuries and any injury number x would've caused me the same anguish or if it is specifically this injury.

I am leaning to the latter because I've never had to go through so much pain to gain so little. It has been 3 months (out of a base 6-9 recovery timeframe) since the surgery and my elbow still refuses to cooperate with me. Every day is a slog just to get it to bend as much as the previous day let alone bend more and improve. My PT and this new brace constantly push my arm and cause me to writhe and squirm. I don't know if I have a very low pain tolerance or what, but she assures me thats not it. Who can say.

The weirdest thing is that it feels strong! Stronger in some ways than my good arm (likely from the fact that its the dominant arm to begin with and not all PT exercises are mirrored) which is irksome and reassuring at the same time. But I'm tired of not being able to use my arm normally and having to always be thinking about it and concerned for it. It's exhausting.

I want normal arm movement back.

ARC